I think some of the most important moments I've had since my RNY have been the ones reflected in the eyes of other people.
I saw my 14-year-old niece, Nikkole, for the first time this weekend since my surgery. She did the cartoon eye-pop thing and then gave me a huge hug. And she whispered in my ear, "Aunt Jen, you look GOOD!"
My brother was with her. He saw me at Thanksgiving and couldn't get over how much I had changed since then.
Saturday was my company Christmas party. And over and over, I'd approach people I hadn't seen in awhile and their eyes would seem to open wider before I'd get the "wow" comment.
Not long ago, I would shrink away from really seeing how I looked in the eyes of others. But now I find it so affirming. The last time I lost a lot of weight, I didn't trust their reaction. What? You thought I was a fat ugly cow before? Maybe they did. But I couldn't take the compliments for what they were worth.
I guess that experience taught me that people may have been shallow enough in the beginning (or maybe never cared enough to notice how I looked). But if they say something nice, they probably mean it.
Bring on the applause and compliments. I'm beginning to feel like I'm worth it.
I CHOOSE
...to love myself.
...to treat myself gently, with patience and respect.
...to accept responsibility for every aspect of my life.
...to be present, awake, aware.
...to be open to possibility.
...to leap with the intention of landing.
...to do amazing things.
...to treat myself gently, with patience and respect.
...to accept responsibility for every aspect of my life.
...to be present, awake, aware.
...to be open to possibility.
...to leap with the intention of landing.
...to do amazing things.
Monday, December 19, 2005
Whozzat Girl?
Posted by JUST JEN at 1:40 PM
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7 comments:
Thanks, SV: I really needed to hear this. I'm having a hard time dealing with the positive comments. I don't know why, but they just kind of make me angry. I need to let the party for me begin. I've never been the center of attention for any reason before, and now, here it comes. Yes, I deserve it. And I need to remember that. Good post.
Congrats! Just smile and eat it up!! No pun intended. :-)
Congrats, Jen! It is an amazing feeling; I just wish I could keep it with me.
Jenn
That is so wonderful. I think it is hard to take positive comments. I commend you.
In the past, it was only the comments of skinny women and (all) men that upset me.
Suddenly, I was 'there' -- they could see me after I dropped 50#s.
Accepting the compliments of others is something I plan to do, as you are doing now -- and good for you for it! (did that make sense? If not, blame my perpetual state of medicated bliss).
Enjoy the + attention as you continue to discover yourself!
Way to go sassy shrinker!
Congradulations on your weight loss. I thing you're not alone in your difficulty accepting compliments at face value. As obese woman I never had self confidence in myself and always wondered what people meant by their compliments. Like somehow I was not worthy of any praise.
Get used to accepting compliments. I had to learn how to do that and to say "thank you". I practiced this in the mirror and that helped me a lot. The compliments will be coming from all over the place. Wait until you get the second glances from the opposite sex :) I'm happily married but the first time that happened, was the first time that happened to me ever in my life.
God bless - Kristen
hey jen,
yeah, i turned that corner at some point and now i'm like, 'bring on the compliments people...' i'll never stop anyone from swooning over my weight loss.
why? because it's a lot of fucking work, i risked my life to do it (in a sense), i spent a zillion dollars, and well, it's HARD. so i'll take it. because not all days are good, and to be honest, i know the right clothes to wear to even encourage it! shame on me, but hey - whatever works...
here's a little secret: i even flirted with a MAN the other day. a MAN. WTF?!?! It was just so interesting to get attention like that...I went with it (harmless really..). Shame on me pt. 2.
Will the effects of this ever end? Anyhow, way to go! do you have any new photos here or on OH? love to see!
jenn s. :)
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