I CHOOSE

...to love myself.
...to treat myself gently, with patience and respect.
...to accept responsibility for every aspect of my life.

...to be present, awake, aware.
...to be open to possibility.
...to leap with the intention of landing.
...to do amazing things.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Ramblings

I went to a party after work tonight and saw several people who haven't seen me since before my surgery. That was interesting. One person didn't even recognize me. A few others did double takes. Some people told me they liked my haircut, but failed to say anything about the weightloss. I don't care that they didn't say anything--it was just strange that they said something about my hair which is really such minor change compared to losing a couple of 4th graders in mass.

Crazy busy week for me. Long hours at work. Teaching a class on Friday night and getting ready for that. A day-long biz seminar on Saturday. More stuff on Sunday. Oh, but a potential shopping trip to IKEA on Monday in celebration of President's Day. If Monday's plans fall through, I'm call the day Vice-President's Day because my intentions will all be shot to hell.

I started an on-line class on emotional eating sponsored by OH. We'll see if it's worth it.

I tasted chocolate lava cake on Valentine's day. The first nibble was wasted because I was talking as I put it in my mouth. I took another small taste and felt like I was eating chocolate for the very first time in my life. And then I took a third and final bite just to make sure I wasn't fooling myself. Nope. Just as good. But the 2 tsp. of chocolate heaven didn't sit so well in my gut. I was miserable for the next hour or so. However, it was worth that moment of feeling like I tasted something for the first time.

I've been focusing on protein and water for the past 2 days. Plenty of shakes and liquids. I had a regular meal on VD. And then today I had cheese and some blackbean shrimp thingy tonight. I'm going to get to my next goal, damnit. I feel it coming on.

I know some people claim a scale victory as soon as it hits the low point, but my deal with myself (since I weigh every day) is that my scale has to read the same 3 days in a row before the loss is official. We're getting close, folks, really close.

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