So, last Saturday Mz. KT and I visited Nordstroms for quality binding, er bonding, time. When Oprah tells you to get fitted for a bra, damnit, you do it. Right?
Before we actually talked to a store associate, we wandered through the land of lifted, separated and downright torturous instrument of cleavage. I have to tell you that some of those contraptions are freakin' ridiculously hilarious. Of course, we mocked them. Because, after all, what self-respecting woman would really wear something like this?
We agreed that only ugly chicks who want to think they're pretty would strap this thing on their boobs. Pretty women wouldn't even bother with a bra like this because they know they don't need it. But I digress.
So this lovely woman ushered us into the fitting room, whipped out her clothe tape measurer and wrapped it snuggly around my chest, pronouncing "38!"
Huh?!? Yep. 38.
After sizing up each side of my bosom, she stretched the tape measurer from the base of my left breast to the sadly downward-pointing nipple and exclaimed, "Double D."
No freakin' way was I a double D. Pre-op I was wearing a 48D. Then a 46D. Then a 44C. Finally, a 42 C as of late June. 38DD? Hell, no! I protested her error and explained about the rapid weightloss, the shrinking boobs, the sagging skin, blah, blah, blah. But she insisted she was right and convinced me to at least try one. Sure, whatever.
So her lovely assistant, Gordita, the 10-year-old, 25-pound Russian princess measuring a statuesque 7 feet tall served me with bra after bra after bra, all in an astonishing 38DD. And damn if everyone didn't fit!
Mz KT has just as much luck as me. Ninety minutes later we each walked out with simply detailed, utterly uplifting bras.
Who the hell needs plastic surgery when your breasts can look this good in a 38DD bra?
Go ahead, you can touch them.
I CHOOSE
...to love myself.
...to treat myself gently, with patience and respect.
...to accept responsibility for every aspect of my life.
...to be present, awake, aware.
...to be open to possibility.
...to leap with the intention of landing.
...to do amazing things.
...to treat myself gently, with patience and respect.
...to accept responsibility for every aspect of my life.
...to be present, awake, aware.
...to be open to possibility.
...to leap with the intention of landing.
...to do amazing things.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
A-B-C-D-DD
Posted by JUST JEN at 9:36 PM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
9 comments:
Now see...getting fitted for a lovely bra always works to your advantage. You lost weight and gained a chest. Bet you didn't count on that! :)
Hmmm, the wonders of a fabu bra! Actually it takes something great to fill it with as well. I only hope and pray mine look that great when all is said and done. Mine look great now but I am scared of what two kids + rapid weight loss will do.
LOL - that seems to happen to SO many people. Apparently we are all wearing the wrong size. Your boobs look hot ;)
I can't wait until I can buy something other than the old Playtex. I am going to make sure I get fitted properly too. Did you buy one of those Wacoal (sp) bras that Oprah raves about?
Tel, I knew you'd want to touch the golden sisters. This is the closest you'll get to seeing the girls naked.
Visit me in the land of the cheeseheads and you can see anything you want.
Post a Comment